'NICE NICE NICE' BISCUITS

Today is my third day of trying to be good and going back to the basics...I am not doing very well...yes I had some 'nice' biscuits about three. I enjoyed every munch and even though I know I will have to count it I don't feel at all worried. I wonder sometimes if I am ready for the sacrifices I will have to make, the habits I will have to break the.... everything really... I think I am almost there!!!!!!!

I look at the weight watchers 'eat out' guide and think that is another habit I will have to change...eating out is one of my needs. I need to socialise and this I normally do around food..I love it and I do think that if I do not do this I will probably go really depressed...I also realise that I can actually replace this habit with a healthier ones...I will have to think what though. If there was a book that really got used it was my weight watcher eating out guide I love it love it love it!!!!!!

Another bad habit is of course my beloved DIET COKE...I love it yes and I know that it is good in some ways to have it instead of other sodas but I have too much of it...I was told many years ago that if I can't stay without it for 24 days than I am addicted...I will try...Water will have to do from next week onward. I know it is better that way...if I manage to do it then I guess I shall continue and occasionally have a diet coke...I solemnly promise....

I felt a bit fat today...what is that all about!!!!? I have had compliments about looking slimmer and better...that should be good....that can only mean that other's are seeing how hard I work in the gym. My shape is getting better...it may not reflect yet on the scales but it does show in other ways...so I shall continue and when weighing in I will no longer look and I no longer want to know how much I weigh....then again if I don't want that then why I am still at weight watchers..I know I know it is because I need to do this with other's in the same boat...they inspire and motivate me.....I do like loosing weight and sharing how good I feel with those sat in the meeting.

I watched supersize vs superskinny this week and I feel for the people...it is a hard journey and they are so courageous to do something like that. I sometimes wonder if I would qualify for the show...I just want the good doctor to give me a eating plan for so many weeks. I look at what they people eat and I feel 'no way' is my eating habits so bad..I don't eat half as much food as some and in fact the skinny guys probably eat more junk than I do but look at MEEEEE! It does make me wonder...I know my downfall is the cakes, crisps, chocs and sweets and then the occasional Indian. I don't have it for a while and when I do have it I indulge big time and then I put on weight..this is what happened this week, I indulged. Then I take it so hard and become a bit morbid and start kicking myself ...then I need a pick me up and this is my plan...

So I can't wait to have my hair cut on Saturday maybe that will give me that extra boost I need to take on this world of mine...it is a constant battle but who would want it any other way...I love my little battles and even though it makes me cry sometimes I know there are people out there with more of a battle and not complaining so why am I!!!